Forget dieing . . . I dare to live

"You can never begin to live until you dare to die." - Unknown {well. . .unknown to me}

They never told you the things you'd do different. They never explained how much it hurt .. . No use living in the past.

I greet the two teen girls. Their bright skinny jeans and skin tight t-shirts beg for attention. But that doesn't define them. Their more than their clothes and boyfriends, even if they don't know it yet. I help them find a game and convince them to take advantage of some ridiculous offer.

I hate my job.

A boy walks in the store and the two girls giggle and look over at him. A boy, a child. Seventeen on the outside, so much younger on the inside. I stop these thoughts with another, I was once the same way. Feeling so grow up and yet never understanding what I fool I was. I looked the fool. I acted the fool. I believed that I was a fool and took pride in it. Pride that I was well liked by teens and thought a fool by adults. I try to forget the fool, but yesterdays loves playing games. Letting my memories disappear and letting smiles dance on my lips. Then poisoning my mind with yesterday.

I ignore the costumers and go on with my job. I go on with my life. I go on. Why? Maybe it's the insane idea that one day I'll be free. Free from regret. Free from the nightmares that haunt my soul.

- excerpt from my current writing project

"One of the saddest things in life is the things one remembers." -Agatha Christie


I dare to forget the past so I can have a future.
I dare to be crazy
I dare to use big and fun words no one understands anymore
I dare to rebel against the myths that society pushes at us
I dare to make a fool of myself by being different
I dare to have fun {it's harder than you think}
Forget dieing . . . I dare to live.

Beautiful People, Amy

I have never done a Beautiful People post and so I thought I'd give it a try. All you  have to do is answer questions about your character, and there are different questions each month. Now I've never done it so I'm going to start with the first series of questions they ever had.

I will be doing my first Beautiful People post on Amy, the girl from my current writing project. If you, after or before reading this, are curious about the book, I wrote an except here.

1. What is her full name?
Amy {At the moment I don't have a full name for her.}

2. Does her name have a special meaning?
Amy was named after her great grandmother who was a an avid reader. She loved her great grandmother, who introduced her to the magic of reading, and loves that she was named after her.

3. Does your character have a methodical or disorganized personality?
Amy has a little bit of both. Normally she is quite organized, but as a writer she can forget about the state of her apartment for weeks on end.

4. Does she think inside herself more than she talks out loud to friends (more importantly, does she actually have friends?)
Amy does tend to think and talk more to herself. She does have a few friends that are real people. She would say she has a boat load of friends, but she considers books to be her friends also.

5. Is there something she is afraid of?
Amy is afraid of letting life pass her by without doing something important. But Amy is also afraid to try new thing and takes comfort in her everyday life.  


6. Does she write, dream, dance, sing, or photograph?
Amy does indeed write and plans on making that her profession. She dreams of writing a book and getting it published. Amy does dance but only in the privacy of her apartment and she does not sing. She tried photography at a younger age but could never make it work.


7. What is her favorite book?
She doesn't have a favorite book but enjoys poetry and anything Shakespeare.


8. Who is her favorite author and/or someone that inspires her?
Amy is inspired by a quote well said and a thought well thought. She has a load of people she is inspired by and couldn't think of just one if her life depended on, although some of her favorite authors are:
 - C.S.Lewis, Shakespeare, Edger Allen Poe, Emily Brontë, Arthur Doyle, and Agatha Christie.
As you can tell by the list of people she is not a big fan of modern authors though it is not the case all the time.

9. Favorite flavor of ice cream
Amy doesn't enjoy ice cream due to a bad experience as a kid and isn't much a big sweets eater either.


10. Favorite season of the year
Amy's favorite season is fall. She loves the inspiration that comes with the change in nature.


Well, I enjoyed writing that and hope you enjoy looking into the life of one of my characters. If you have never done a Beautiful People post you should, they are very fun!

just blah {your opinion needed}

It's so  funny the way random paragraphs that just come to you every once and a while. Oddly enough mine are all depressing and...well...random. But since I have had this bit of writing in my folder for longer then I can remember I thought why not share it with someone. That's right, you my readers are the first to view this bit of writing.

  There they were again. Walking the streets as if they believed what they shouted, "We protect the people. We help the people." Those ridicules "uniforms" they wear would be a thing for complete ridicule if the guns they wore weren't so oftenly used. In fact, I think they invent reasons to shot. And I think our so called government approves of it.   

    

    I sat on the floor looking out of the clear plastic that's meant to be a window. But I'm not fooled. It's not a window, like the so called food we eat is not food. Like the so called life we live, is not living. We are trapped by our own thoughts and the people that encourage them...And the people that encourage them.

First, I know 'oftenly' isn't a word but it fit. I am an artist and must, every one in a while, set aside the rules.

Second, please be painfully honest. Whether this is cheesy, heartwarming, or just blah.

Philosophical Thoughts

not my photo

I love books with a philosophical message hidden deep inside it. And a book I have been reading recently is just that. As I was reading Showdown by Ted Dekker an insisting question is discussed in the book.

In writing is it best to show peace or conflict first?

Character one says, "How can there be conflict unless there is first peace?"

But character two answer, "But how can you write about peace or love unless you first subject the reader to ugly conflict?" 

Well that makes since, until character one answers. "Unless the reader begins with knowledge of peace, why should we demonstrate peace through conflict if the reader already knows peace?"

Um...I'm going to have to take a rain check on the rest of this conversation. Dispite the confusen of this conversation, it brings up some very good points. Do we not react to conflict in books because we are not familiar with the conflict but understand it's conflict because we first know peace. The funny thing is I don't really think there is an answer for this question. It can be debated both ways and I believe they are equally right. Maybe I will get to the bottom if it by the end of the book.

But what about you? What you do think is best to show first in writing, peace or conflict?